When are we going back to school shopping, Mom?
Have you gotten my school supplies list yet?
When is my Open House?
Over the last week, both my teens have pelted me with these unwelcome questions. I still have sand on my feet from my last trip to the beach, for goodness sakes! School is about to start?! Really? How rude.
And yet, I know I have to start preparing. Because I’ve learned the hard way that when I don’t have a proactive plan for success, I leave the door wide open for less than spectacular results.
I call that approach “survival mode.” Yes, I make sure the basics get done — homework, baths, eating. But when I’m in that mode, I don’t keep the big picture in mind. I neglect to make adjustments and cast vision for my children. I’m not deliberate about equipping and helping them set goals.
Sure, I might be making sure tonight’s Algebra homework gets done. But I also need to help them see how the “to-dos” of today help them accomplish what they want to do in the future.
So, in addition to the questions my children are asking me, here’s a few questions I’m asking myself:
Question #1: What’s not working? Right now, I’m looking back on last year. What are areas of struggle for me and my kids? Mornings continue to be a sore spot for us. And since morning sets the tone for the day, I think it’s worth my continuing effort to improve how our day begins.
How? Well, the last time I took a bath at night was when I was 7 years old. But I’ve decided I’m going to shower and wash my hair at night, instead of in the morning. And I’m going to get up 20 minutes before the kids. That way, I’ll be dressed and ready — and present and undistracted to better keep the kids on track.
I’m also going to start packing the next day’s lunch in the afternoon, when I’m emptying that day’s lunchbox leftovers. (Thank you, Kathy, for this brilliant tip.)
Question #2: Who do I need to call for help? Do your child(ren) need tutoring help? Are you interested in carpooling? A few weeks before school starts is the time to start thinking about setting up these arrangements. Tutors’ schedules fill up fast. I’m calling tutors this week so we can get times and days that work best for our family’s schedules.
Question #3: What can my kids do for themselves? Time goes by quickly. Our kids are growing up. Which means they are maturing and are able to do more than they were six months or a year ago.
But I know I’ve been guilty of continuing to do things for them that they can do for themselves. Just because I’ve always done it. It’s a habit. And I have control when I do it. It’s hard to let go of that! But we’re supposed to be equipping our children to live outside our home — without us. So, I’m turning over school uniform-washing duties to my 13-year-old son. My daughter is old enough to make more and more choices about her classes and what options she wants to pursue — or not pursue — to prepare her for college. She’s nearly 17. I have to back off in some areas.
Question #4: What projects and milestones are coming up this year? Molly will be taking her ACTs and SATs this year. We’re starting to talk to her about test preparation this fall, which includes tutoring. Micah has a big science fair project due this year. Last year, he forgot about his deadline to submit his project idea until 10 p.m. the night before it was due. To avoid that, I’m going to encourage him to decide on his idea early in the year. We can buy the materials and get a jump start on it.
Asking and answering these questions now will help equip us and our children when the school bell rings.
Soon, we’ll be off and running. And all our preparation (or lack of it!) will be put to the test.
15 Comments
Love the reflective nature of this post. I’ll be sharing it out and about — it has the potential to make this year even better for loads of families!
{Melinda} Thank you so much, Kimberly!! Really appreciate your kind words on Twitter and for sharing! 🙂
I may have to do the “shower at night” thing because middle school starting at 7:15 (!!!) kicks my tail. Last year I made them responsible for packing their own lunches so that helped. Thanks for sharing with us at LOBS and anytime you guys want to share with me over at Ten to Twenty, I would LOVE it!! Kristen
{Melinda} I get it. Molly’s school starts at 7:25. It’s killer! And then I immediately have to take my son to the opposite of town for his school at 8 am. Would love to come by and share over at Ten to Twenty! 🙂
I am never ready for back to school. I always have grand plans to be organized, to go into the year with a schedule and a plan…and I fail miserably every time. Am I destined to be a fly by the seat of my pants mom? Perhaps…
{Melinda} Oh, I get it, Michelle! Some years I’m better than others. This year, I have too much going to not be organized so I’m forcing myself to get a jump on it! 🙂
I am sooo not ready to think about school, yet….but you are right about starting early! I gave permission to myself to not think about it until August…and here we are! We have lots of changes this year, too. Our first son going away for the first time…another starting at a local college..a high school senior…a freshman…and our special needs son starting in a new classroom at a different school…oh, and my youngest son starts preschool! Yikes…when I write it all down it gives me a panic attack! I will be taking it one day at a time and giving myself until mid-Sept to get into a new routine!
{Melinda} Wow, you have got a lot going on girl! Seriously, I am praying for you right now, Michelle. That’s a lot to transition and handle at all the same time. Yes, give yourself lots of time and grace, my friend. Hugs. <3
It’s nice to see I’m not the only one who does this! It’s so helpful to reflect and see what’s working and what’s not and then MAKE the changes. I definitely wake-up at least 30 min before my kids and it’s a huge help for me. My boys are still young but a lot of the same things apply when it comes to planning! Good luck!!:-)
{Melinda} Thanks, Allie! I’ll need it! But planning definitely makes having good “luck” more likely. 🙂
Ah…. it’s so good to be back and reading your wonderful posts!! I have missed YOU girls!!!
Yes- I shower at night and that helps immensely with morning rush!
I cannot even start to think of school even though next TUESDAY is back to school day! I have piles of forms on my counter and yet, I am still “in it” with hosting a big family reunion starting tonight through Sunday. Perhaps after that…
Thank you for these tips- I need to re-read this post next week!!
{Melinda} We’ve missed you, too!! We’ve been so busy and have a new, exciting project in the works that we’re not quite ready to reveal yet. 😉 Coming soon!
We start school on Tuesday, too. So early!! It’s coming whether we’re ready or not! 🙂
This year will be different from all the rest. This year, I begin homeschooling my boys. It will be very interesting, especially with a 3 year old girl who won’t get why brothers are home but cannot play. 🙂 Prayers definitely welcome!
I am still feeling unprepared for this upcoming year, but that’s because it is new, I’m nervous and I want it to go perfectly. God has told me, on more than one occasion, that it’s not about getting it right how I see it as being right – it’s about doing what He leads me to do as He leads me and trusting Him. It is not easy, but I’m working on it! 🙂
I am looking forward to this year, scary and new though it is, and I think the boys are, too! 🙂
Great post and tips!
{Melinda} That is a big transition, Julie, and a real commitment. We will definitely be keeping you in our prayers. <3
Thank you, Melinda! It was always the plan since I have a teaching degree (English major/Math minor), but it will still be a huge transition! I appreciate your prayers so much!