I know it’s coming.
I’ll be honest. At times it seems a long way off. And I struggle to cling to the promise of its arrival.
Like when I’m holding a firm boundary with my teenage daughter — for the 412th time. And I fight the urge to surrender.
Or when I’m sitting in the doctor’s office with my son — as we continue to wage our 12-year battle with cystic fibrosis. And the future seems cloudy and frightening.
And so I wait for my joy to come. But it’s not idle waiting. It’s filled with small, but steady steps forward and a thousand silent decisions to not give in to discouragement and weariness.
As I wait for the ultimate fulfillment of my mothering joy, I rejoice in each victory and those unexpected moments that reveal something tender or godly in one of my children. And I say, “Thank you, God. Right now, at this moment in time, it’s all really good. And I am grateful.”
God knows we need these glimpses of the greater joys to come. They give us the motivation to keep climbing our mothering mountains — both big and small.
Because motherhood means accepting a certain amount of deferred joy. We place investments in our mothering banks that we pray will reap dividends. But those investments require time to mature.
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One day, I hope that teenage girl defiance will slowly gave way to a mature young woman. And that all the persistence will yield a relationship of mutual respect.
But not today.
One day, I hope to rejoice in a young man who pursues his health with the same determination that I have over all these years.
But not today.
One day, I will watch my children leave my home. They will leave with baggage. Scars from my mistakes. But I hope it will also be with the knowledge that mom never gave up. She always believed. And I’ll rest in that.
But not today.
At times during our mothering journey, the wait may seem long. But “one day” will eventually become “today.” And all the battles we waged during the wait, will only make our joy more sweet.
I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15: 13 (NLT)
7 Comments
Wow wow wow. It’s been quite some time since I’ve read writing as beautiful as yours. What a great ‘voice’ you have and what a beautiful way to say things. Love this….
The thing that stands out in my mind is that those good things come at the sacrifice of some of the things that are good right now. I try not too look forward too far because I don’t want to miss today’s joys!
{Melinda} In some seasons of mothering, looking ahead is what gives us hope and joy because the present seems so hard at times. That doesn’t mean there isn’t joys to be found in the “now” but it is hopeful to me to know that the battles of today must be fought in order for there to be joy in the future — not just MY joy but my kids’ joy.
Hope you enjoy a wonderful, joy-filled Thanksgiving with your sweet family. 🙂
What a BEAUTIFUL and POWERFUL post Melinda! It speaks to all moms everywhere, as they climb the “motherhood mountain” and the joy is far off in the distance. Thank you for your encouraging words… 🙂
{Melinda} Thanks for your sweet words, Chris. I’m going through a rough season lately and it’s the promise of that joy that’s coming that keeps me focused!
Oh, Melinda…we really are leading the same life, aren’t we? It’s not today for me either but I trust that it will be someday. You are in my prayers. Always.
{Melinda} We are, AnnMarie! That’s why God gave us each other to encourage and pray for one another. Praying continually for you as well, my friend. 🙂